Dave Crashed Into the Cuckoo’s Nest, Part V
A Week Fighting to Get Out of the Mad House: An Epic Poem in 7 Installments
[Typed the mornings of September 20-21, 2022 from notes written in crayon the previous week while on an involuntary hold at the psych ward at Pacific Grove Hospital in Riverside, California after a ketamine infusion therapy to treat the PTSD went bad, leaving the Poet more suicidal and self-hating than before it began, prompting the doctor to insist on a “5150” 72-hour hold.]
Check out part I here:
Part II:
Part III:
Part VI:
8:18 AM My mother still not willing to support my release. Wants me to be on Lithium first even though they haven’t mentioned Lithium to me. 10:13 AM Grouptime. Get to be outside and throw soft lawn darts. Like cornhole game played in the other ward.
After 10:00 AM 6 people out here. Paul here for 5 days, quiet, wears a diaper Juan Edward – new, bald, army pants, air force reserve t-shirt Brandon – guy who I let read my books Donald – California enthusiast with lots of tattoos 6 points to win – I just won! Figured out how to toss underhand for more accuracy. Charlie just came out. Seems subdued Everyone has played now. Pattie came out to watch. I just won again. 6 points to win Charlie and Brandon now playing. Asian woman Sun who was watching Evangelical TV now out. 10:55 AM – I think Came back inside. Was being overstimulated. After 11:00 AM Back in reading room with friends. Brandon reading Schrodinger’s Cat, Charlie reading Catching the Big Fish. Juan playing with yatzee dice. Snack Time – milk, chocolate granola, Rold Gold pretzels Am now sharing my books with Brandon, Charlie and a new woman named Beatrice who I let take the David Lynch book back to her room. Brandon now reading Dead Sea Scrolls book after first reading Schrodinger’s Cat. Will need to ask him why he is here. 2:05 PM Finally had a great session here with someone on my side. A social worker heard my story and evaluated me. She was outraged that I am being held here when I shouldn’t be. She advocated for me to the nurse and said she would write an email. Ilon – name of social worker.
Enduro (Propranalol) – 10mg / 3 times Thorazine – 200mg / 100 morning, 100 night I asked for the specific meds and dosages I am on now. 2:43 PM Looks like Gandotra is making the rounds. I am going to ask politely to be discharged today. Gandotra says that if I have another good day tomorrow then discharge on Monday.
3:30 PM Outside and getting sun. Feeling great now that I have a plan to leave on Monday. Thank God for that social worker. She is probably the main reason Gandotra caved. All three nurses out with their precious phones. The Louder the motorcycle, The smaller the penis
5:43 PM Dinner over and Spider-Man 2 plays on the TV – the best of the series. Going to continue with Lind’s Up from Conservatism and try to finish it. Woman in glasses who borrowed my Lynch book just reminded me she had it, and promised to return it when I wanted. I told her she could continue to read it.
Thank God for the social workers who advocate for their clients.
What a place! What a system! 🥺